Food Blogger Problems

I’ve written about blogger problems before, which I confess, even then was very food focused, but I’ve been thinking again about some of the absolute nonsense I find myself worrying about as a food blogger. The below are all ludicrous things to be concerned by, but they’re all part of that food blog life…

The Botanist nibbles

  • Canapes. Now, I love canapes, but they do present many a challenge, aside from the ‘not enough hands to eat this and take pictures’ issue. Most of them are socially awkward human troubles like being given messy food and dropping it down your front, or taking a huge bite of something that turns out to have the same internal temperature as the sun, or trying to work out what to do with napkins or toothpicks after you’ve eaten. Once I was invited to a very expensive wedding dress shop where I was given a tail-on prawn with chilli dip to eat. I was terrified of getting dip on a white dress that cost three times my rent, and then when I’d eaten it, I realised there was no bin to be seen to put the tail in. I ended up trying to nonchalantly disguise it in a napkin, which I then put in my coat pocket, until I could leave and chuck it in a bin outside. I am forever classy.
  • You’ve had one too many glasses of free prosecco and now you’re worried you’ve made a bit of a knob of yourself in front of the PR or the brand rep. Cringe.
  • You took the piss out of a blogger friend for buying one of those clip-on selfie lights for their phone but have now discovered just how good they are to combat the dreaded orange light, and now you’ve bought one too and have to accept you’ve become that person. Your non-blog pals are now embarrassed to sit with you because you might attach a ring light to your phone.
  • Everyone you know asks for restaurant suggestions all the time and you feel weirdly pressured to suggest the place where they will have THE BEST NIGHT OF THEIR LIFE and if they never mention it again, you feel like a failure.
  • Because you’re out all the time eating pasta and drinking sugary cocktails, your favourite dress doesn’t zip up anymore.
  • You’re always mildly hungover.
  • Your Instagram feed is all food, so you’re forever hungry, and have mega food envy.
  • You regularly have to apologise for stroppy behaviour when hangry. Hanger is a real thing, people.
  • People are sort of disappointed in you when they see you eating a McDonalds’ or making potato smiles at home, instead of out somewhere swish.

It’s a hard life…